Fun in the sun

We're back from the beach! It was such a great time. Family, yummy food, sunny days, and plenty of entertainment from our borderline ADHD children. Here's some great quotes from the weekend:

On our way to the beach, traffic is moving slowly and I tell Dan a story about how a few days ago I missed a light in a left turn lane because of an idiot in front of me who decided he didn't want to turn and tried to merge into traffic going straight except their light was red and no one could let him in. My story was quite long and full of a lot of emotion. No, me telling a long story? It's true, my friends. Anyway, Jake says "Mom, I'm going to find those bad guys in their car and I'll be the pirate and get'em with my sword and throw them in the garbage because they can't be mean to you like that." My night in shining armor.

When we got to the beach Jake proudly showed everyone his hot wheels, including a semi-truck that says "Farm Fresh Milk" on the side. Uncle Dan: "How do you think they get the milk inside that truck?" Jake: "Well, first they take the milk out of the cow's bottom, then they put it in a bucket..." I think I told him once that milk comes from a cow's body. Evidently I need to enunciate.

On a complete side note Ty just crawled underneath me while I'm typing and bit my left big toe. Hard. I said, "OUCH. Did you seriously just bite me?" Yes. "Why?" Because I want to. Hmm, sounds about right. Here's some other Ty specials. First of all, I need to clarify that Ty uses the word "because" approximately 28 times in each sentence. I don't know why. Just go with it. "No uncle Marc, because you can't play football because you're too older." Then, while looking at a very distant relative he's never met, "Is he a mean guy?" No, he's a very nice guy. "Oh...can I hit 'im?"
This next direct quotation didn't happen at the beach, but I forgot to post this earlier and it IS my blog, so...here you go. A few weeks ago we're sitting upstairs watching TV and I realize I haven't seen Ty in a while. "Ty?" Silence. "TY??" Silence. "TYLER??!!" I hear the pitter patter of tiny feet walking toward me and a faint "Yeah?" "What are you doing?" He comes around the corner with wet hands, and I'm pretty sure I didn't just hear water running, so I'm really starting to wonder. I repeated my question and he proceeded to tell me just what he had been doing. "Because my hands are wet, because I had a booger and because my booger was on my hands, because I needed to get my booger off, because I put my booger and my hands in the toilet--DON'T spank me--because I wiped my hands and because my booger in the toilet..." Dan and I were in tears. I wish you could have seen him. He stopped dramatically and pointed his little index finger right at me when he said "don't spank me" and then didn't miss another beat with his booger/toilet/because story. That about sums up child #2.

Speaking of summing things up...the beach was fantastic. Dan's family is so much fun, and the weather was pretty perfect, and Ty didn't vomit in the car like our last beach trip (gotta love Dramamine). We were surprised that Jake didn't actually like the bumper cars in Seaside. I believe his words were "I hate those things" after the white-knuckled 3 minutes that Ty thoroughly enjoyed. Who knows. They both loved the carousel at the mall (I use the term mall very loosely. I'm pretty sure the Seaside "Mall" houses the carousel and the crazy hat store and the "Old Tyme" photo studio, and...that's about it.)

Why no pictures of the vacation? Because I've tried really hard to paint a beautiful picture for you already. You don't really need actual photos do you? Actually, the truth is that I'm probably going to have to commit myself to an institution because I haven't been able to get my pictures to upload to blogger despite 385 attempts to do so. "Internal error," it keeps saying to me, over and over and over...I'll show you internal error. Maybe I'll have better luck tomorrow. Unless my institution doesn't have internet access. Then you're just out of luck.